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Eidolon – E.S. Yu
When Cyrex Corp, one of the foremost bioaugmentation companies in the world, sends Vax to assassinate Zai Lumero, Vax thinks it’ll be a simple, straightforward job. Zai is only a journalist, after all, and with his bioaugments, Vax has never botched a job before. But then the hit unexpectedly goes south, and before Vax can correct his mistake and finish Zai off for good, he discovers that Cyrex has turned on him, putting him in their crosshairs as well.
With no one else to turn to, he strikes a grudging partnership with Zai to help him expose Cyrex’s connection to a missing persons case and take the company down. Getting along with a justice crusader who hates Vax’s profession with a burning passion isn’t easy—though Vax finds himself drawn to Zai in a way he never expected.
As they race against time to unearth Cyrex’s secrets, Vax can’t shake the feeling that Zai is hiding something from him. And the closer he gets to uncovering the answers—of how he’s related to Zai’s investigation, and how Zai is connected to a past that Vax can’t remember—the more he suspects that finding out the truth might destroy him.
The book caught my attention with two magic words: assassin and asexual.
Eidolon is a sci-fi book about an assassin who was hired to kill a journalist investigating the company the assassin is working for. When he tried do his job, he was in for nasty surprise.
Vax, the assassin doesn’t seem to be hard-core and deadly. He seemed more like a harassed salaryman trying to get the job done and get the boss off his back. His boss being Atali Norman, CEO of Cyrex and one hell of a manipulative bastard. When Vax was confronting Atali, I was like, just shoot him already! Don’t talk to him, he will mindfuck you! Vax then proceeded to prove himself human.
Zai, the crusading journalist, is out to uncover the nasty secrets of bioaugmentation companies.I liked that he is very dedicated to his job. Meeting Vax was like meeting a ghost but that doesn’t stop him from involving Vax in doing what he set out to do. There were a LOT of complications, personal and otherwise but Zai was, if anything, determined to do good so he made it work.
I think this should really be two stories. First is the sci-fi dystopian thread where humans were augmented with electronic parts for medical purposes or more insidiously to create super soldiers and spies.
This is a fast read and the writing was easy to go through.
I liked the world building here. It was not bogged down by info-dump but relevant bits and pieces were mentioned here and there that mesh naturally to create a good picture of the futuristic city of Orphis. There was a big mystery and some action scenes. This part by itself makes for an interesting read.
The second part was a hurt-comfort story about a man trying to deal with PTSD, depression and amnesia. This had a more contemporary feel, the futuristic elements were insignificant and barely mentioned. I liked how the mental issue and the asexuality were handled. I felt the friendship more than the romantic spark between Vax and Zai. I think Vax is in dire need of friends right now although their relationship had a good potential to be so much more exciting had the story been solely about second chances and dealing with mental illness.
Overall, I wasn’t blown away but I liked the story. The sci-fi elements were done nicely, the mystery was intriguing enough to hold my attention, the premise was interesting and the prose is uncomplicated. However, the first part and the second part seemed disconnected and I would have preferred two different stories if not a better transition/connection between the sci-fi mystery and the drama part.
P.S.
I received a copy of Eidolon from Ninestar Press via Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
Rating:
3 Stars – not exactly setting my world on fire but I liked it
Soundtrack: Someone Great
Artist: LCD Soundsystem
Album: Sound of Silver(source: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/41059670-eidolon)
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Broken – Nicola Haken
Author’s note:
“For anyone who’s ever felt a little broken. Keep going – one breath at a time. You are important”When Theodore Davenport decides to switch his mundane job for a career, he walks into Holden House Publishing with enthusiasm and determination to succeed. As he settles into his new role, makes new friends, and dreams of making it to the top, everything is going to plan.
Until he meets James Holden, CEO of Holden House.
James Holden hasn’t been able to stop thinking about his encounter with the timid man he met in a club bathroom last week, and when he discovers the one haunting his dreams is an employee, he can’t seem to stop himself from pursuing him.
Just a little fun – that’s what James tells himself. He can’t afford to care for someone who can never reciprocate, not once they find out who he really is. James believes nobody deserves the burden of being attached to him. He’s a complicated man. Damaged. Difficult. Demanding.
Broken.
Is Theodore strong enough to confront James’ demons? More importantly, is James?
Please note:This book contains scenes of self harm, mental illness and suicidal ideation which may be uncomfortable for some readers.
Audiobooks are what I am into nowadays because my eyesight is getting worse (devastating news for a book blogger). It’s quite a game changer, enhancing my literary experience through voices, accents and acting and motivating me to finish what I would have otherwise DNF’ed after a couple of chapters. Basically if the narrator sounds good and there are some fancy schmancy accents, there is a higher probability I’ll see things through to the end no matter how shitty the story.
Broken is one such book. If I just read the blurb, I wouldn’t have bothered since contemporaries are mostly a miss with me but when I heard the opening chapter, I was greeted with Mancunian. So I decided to give it a go.
And what a beautiful, emotionally satisfying book it turned out to be, resonating strongly due to some personal experiences. It took a while for me to get into it, mainly because James came across as an annoying, arrogant bastard at first and I was ready to drop the book but the witty banter between Theo and Tess won me over. James gradually turned out to be not such an asshole Theo made him out to be and there were some sweet and fun times that slowly ease its way into darker times as James finally gave in to his inner demons.
James has type 2 bipolar disorder which is a very difficult illness to deal and live with. Nicola Haken wrote very accurate scenarios of how it is for both the patient and the people who love them. I marvelled at Theo’s strength and unconditional love. He never gave up on James and that is something a bipolar patient needs, someone who never gives up on you even if you already have.
“When your boat is drifting from the shore, it’s okay to use an anchor for support. We all need an anchor. Without people to love us, we’d just drift further and further away.”
Broken tackles complex themes but it’s not a heavy book. Haken managed to balance the darker notes with lighter moments of humor and romance. It shares a hopeful message that yes, we might not get cured but we will be okay.
Rating:
4.5 – perfection is only half a step awaySoundtrack: Maybe Tomorrow
Artist: Stereophonics
Album:You Gotta Go There to Come Back
(source: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/20646135-broken)
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A Love Song for the Sad Man in the White Coat – Roe Horvat
Simon had always expected love to feel different than this. Whether it was his Catholic upbringing or the poetry he’d read – Simon had thought that true love would be uplifting, fulfilling, that it would give a meaning to his loitering, and add joy to his leisure. But not this kind of love. This love was a flesh-eating monster, sharp-clawed and evil-eyed, ravishing his mind with medieval cruelty.
Dr Simon Mráz is a respected specialist and lecturer at the Charles University in Prague. He is a serious man, responsible. His students call him The Cruel Doctor Frost not because he’s unkind, but because of his unwavering, ice-cold composure. As a psychiatrist, he values sanity. And sanity can be found in work, restraint, and self-control.
Not many know of that one time in the past when The Cruel Doctor Frost lost his cool. His ill-advised, secret affair with a student left Simon deeply wounded. Since that day, every minute of Simon’s life has been a struggle to remain sane, functioning. He’s managed so far – as long as he is needed, as long as his work makes a difference, Simon can scrape together enough strength to get up in the morning and run off the nightmares. But when his friends begin drifting away, his beloved protégé becomes independent, and the man who bereaved Simon of his precious sanity might return… Simon’s mind and body stop responding to his impressive willpower.
Some authors write fictional books that are semi-autobiographical. Based on their (Horvat’s pronoun) books, I’m guessing Roe Horvat used to work in a university, possibly in a psychiatric medicine-related field. I also suspect that they might have become involved with a student in a more personal level. But that’s just me speculating.
The story started with Matej, making his daring move on Dr. Simon Mraz which paid off really well. They had an affair then Matej disappeared leaving Simon and Marta, Matej’s sister, to cope with the loss.
Unfortunately, I felt an irrational annoyance towards Matej for leaving these people without closure. Logically, I know he had his reasons, abusive father, trauma and what not, but to disappear without any contact for years seemed selfish. I didn’t warm up to Simon. People kept saying he was cold, logical and rational which would normally make me like him but he just came across as miserable, restless and empty but that is mostly probably the author’s point. Simon showed signs of the big D and having gone through that myself, I totally understand where he’s coming from but reading about it is not pleasant.
I know it’s not doing the book justice but I skipped part two because I didn’t feel like going through the details of what happened in the past. Most of the stuff there, I already know from part one but you might want to check it out for the steam and the fluff.
Part three was the best part, in my opinion. Here, we meet the present day Matej whom I could finally forgive and it was quite refreshing to see Simon get hammered. My favorite characters were Mike, Lukas’ boyfriend and Marta. They bought joy and lightness in what was otherwise a dismal atmosphere. The reunion was an emotional nuclear bomb but the resolution came on gentle tiptoes after some opiods and alcohol. It was all worth it.
Even if it hits close to home, reading about missing someone or somebody with mental disorders is never enjoyable for me and it doesn’t necessarily make me sympathetic to the characters. But what I loved most about the book is that I am given a clear picture of real Czech people and Eastern Europe. None of the touristy stuff such as those found here but a real insider perspective. This is particularly interesting for me because this is half-way across the world and I would probably never get to visit these places in my lifetime. I also liked how Horvat casually throws around indie and literary references without seeming like a pretentious name dropper. Bjork, Radiohead, Henry Rollins, Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, they’re all in there along with Rimbaud, Terry Pratchett and Cards Against Humanity. Simon and Matej AND Horvat know their stuff.
Overall, some people might go for the feels but I went for the realism. Read it for a good dose of both.
Rating
3.5 Stars – that place between like and loveSoundtrack: Red Eyes and Tears
Artist: Black Rebel Motorcycle Club
Album: B.R.M.C.(source: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/36697128-a-love-song-for-the-sad-man-in-the-white-coat)
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Tork & Adam: If I Should Stumble – Claire Davis & Al Stewart
Love is sure and timeless and forever. It whispers over the morning coffee and the last thought before sleep. Love is beyond hope, and cruel as life.
Kaz has been in the UK for almost a year, but the days pass by in an endless round of alcohol and nothingness. He has a story but no words good or bad enough to tell it, until one day, he is assigned a new peer mentor who asks him to help train a sponsored running team. Something that was stretched as old parchment breaks inside, and memories begin to re-surface.
Zack is overjoyed when his friend Adam asks him to be part of the sponsored run team trying to make money for the local homeless shelter. All day he makes cakes to lighten people’s load, but something is missing from his life. Then he meets the boy with eyes like the desert, and with every step he runs, Zack’s light burns away the darkness in Kaz’s heart.
As the race heats gets nearer, Tork, Adam, Zack and Jo realise that under Kaz’s careful programme, they have a chance to qualify and set right some of the wrongs of this world.
This book features the characters Tork and Adam from The Invasion of Tork and The Invasion of Adam.
Reading about Kaz feeling guilty about liking boys, I wanted to shake him and tell him, it’s totally OK. Somehow I have taken it for granted because there are gays and lesbians everywhere here in my country, that in other places and other people still find it hard to come to terms with their sexuality. I’m so used to the fact that there is usually no big to-dos about coming out here. What usually happens is that a boy starts to get swishy at an early age, wears shorts that are too short, would more or less join gay beauty pageants and/or date another boy. People might make some insulting comments at first, then get used to the fact and would just treat them normally. I think it really helps that most gay guys have a great sense of humor so people tend to like them.
So I’m sorry Kaz, I wasn’t feeling your pain. But go! GIve Zack a hug, a kiss, whatever…be happy!!! Like Tork and Adam. You all deserve it.
Rating:
3 Stars – not exactly setting my world on fire but I liked it
Soundtrack: Everytime I Thought About It I’d Burst Into Tears
Artist: Hello, Psychaleppo
Album: Gool ‘lah(source: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/32742275-if-i-should-stumble)
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Dear Mona Lisa… – Claire Davis & Al Stewart
Tom, shy office clerk by day and drawer of foxes by night wakes up one Monday knowing the most extraordinary week of his life is about to begin. In five days time a lifelong ‘secret’ will be made gloriously public—but will it mean losing the person he loves most?
Getting married…
It seems like only yesterday Tom changed nappies and sang nursery rhymes to a laughing baby. He relishes the demands of being a daddy; especially teaching his little girl to draw and paint as she grows up.
But the years tick by and times change. Long-buried secrets must come to the surface which may test even the strongest ties.Tom and Lawrence…
He writes a list of all the things he has to do before the weekend and sticks it in the middle of his wall. The names and goals hang like threads of a spider’s web, inevitably leading to the centre, and all to the same place.
Dear Mona Lisa…
How to explain?
Each morning he notes the colours of dawn, listens to the birds and waits for the perfect moment. In one hand rests the balance of life and a terrible responsibility, in the other a wedding ring. Difficult days and the past loom, but his friends rally round and one by one the words come to life.
Everyone waits as Tom finds the strength to open up and set free the secrets of his heart in a celebration of family, friendship and love.
A quirky story of modern life, set within the breathtaking landscape of Bradford.Claire Davis and Al Stewart create stories that are sweet and emotional. Dear Mona Lisa have all those feels in abundance. Why it merited two stars from me was because I struggled with the writing style. Right from the start I felt like I was dropped in the middle of a story so I was very much confused and quite frankly, bored with what Tom was talking about. From what he says, I think he has some special condition where his senses work differently (smells colours, sees animals everywhere, etc) which in itself was interesting but It took a while to figure out what was what which affected my experience with the story. However that’s just me. It clicked with most readers so ahead and give it a try.
Rating:
2 Stars – it’s a struggle to finish the damn bookSoundtrack: The Fox in the Snow
Artist: Belle & Sebastian
Album: If You’re Feeling Sinister(source: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/35848708-dear-mona-lisa)
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REVIEW: We Met in Dreams by Rowan Mcallister
We Met in Dreams – Rowan Mcallister
In Victorian London, during a prolonged and pernicious fog, fantasy and reality are about to collide—at least in one man’s troubled mind.
A childhood fever left Arthur Middleton, Viscount Campden, seeing and hearing things no one else does, afraid of the world outside, and unable to function as a true peer of the realm. To protect him from himself—and to protect others from him—he spends his days heavily medicated and locked in his rooms, and his nights in darkness and solitude, tormented by visions, until a stranger appears.
This apparition is different. Fox says he’s a thief and not an entirely good sort of man, yet he returns night after night to ease Arthur’s loneliness without asking for anything in return. Fox might be the key that sets Arthur free, or he might deliver the final blow to Arthur’s tenuous grasp on sanity. Either way, real or imaginary, Arthur needs him too much to care.
Fox is only one of the many secrets and specters haunting Campden House, and Arthur will have to face them all in order to live the life of his dreams.
Really, really not a fan of huge age gaps so it sort of bothered me all through out the book and the ending was a bit of an overkill but I thoroughly enjoyed reading this.
Most of the events happened in one room but it was never boring. I found myself rooting for Arthur and was so glad that this is a HEA type of book. Fox, I didn’t really care for TBH but he was the kind of support Arthur needed.
Plus this book has the best dedication ever:
“To all those who fight a daily battle that no one sees.
Fight on.”Aaaand…the cover is perfect!! Given how cringe-inducing most M/M book covers are, this one was refreshingly not tacky and the blurb definitely made me start reading it right away.
Rating:
4 Stars – minor quibbles but I loved it to bits(source: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/34034729-we-met-in-dreams)
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