The Protectors: The Hazard and The Hitman – Cambria Hebert

Desperate times call for desperate measures, and being in the hospital with stitches in my head and no way out makes me pretty desperate. So I log in to a dating app, searching for a guy willing to pretend to be my boyfriend so I can bust out of this overpriced nightmare.
But what do I get?
Accused of being a prostitute. Talk about a waste of phone minutes.
With plan A a no-go, I move on to plan B. Escape. Except, on my way to freedom, I’m nearly pummeled by a man wearing all black and with the bluest eyes I’ve ever seen.
When he pretends to be my boyfriend, I’m shook. And even more shook when I discover this is the rude guy from the app.
Turns out he’s not only rude but bossy, irritable, and he keeps calling me a walking hazard. I go along with the lie anyway, thinking I can ditch him as soon as I’m free.
Except that doesn’t happen.
I end up back at his place, eating soup and trying hard not to catch feelings.
Then my apartment is broken into, and I’m running for my life, confused, injured, and with nowhere else to go. Kieran vows to keep me safe, something he seems more than capable of… Which is kinda odd for a real estate agent, right?
As the threat to my life intensifies, I start to wonder if I’ll make it to my next birthday and, more importantly, if trusting Kieran is the deadliest hazard of all.

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The Hazard and The Hitman kicks off The Protectors, a hitman romance series by Cambria Hebert

The hazard, Hazier is a lonely orphan juggling four jobs. After a car accident lands him in the hospital, he can’t afford the bills and needs a companion to be discharged. Desperate, he messages a random guy on a dating app to pose as his boyfriend.

The hitman is Kieran. Intrigued by the odd request from a cute stranger, he shows up, quickly realizes Hazier is telling the truth, and steps into the role of protective boyfriend—going so far as to pay the hospital bill.

But Kieran soon discovers Hazier is a walking disaster who can’t be left alone and starts calling him Hazard. Worse, there’s a contract on Haz’s life, and Kieran himself was hired to kill him.

The premise is ridiculously cute, but Haz’s dude in distress antics wore thin. His clumsy, too-stupid-to-live moments weren’t endearing and dragged the story down. Also, Kieran and Haz suffered various injuries which seemed to magically vanish whenever sex entered the picture. At one point, Haz even had a head injury, which didn’t stop him from giving Kieran a blowjob.

Fortunately, I loved Kieran’s grumpy, over-protective brand of alphahole energy which carried the book. He fell hard and fast, ready to burn the world for his Hazard. His broody presence and swoony declarations made Haz tolerable.

Side characters Ghost, hitman and Kieran’s best friend, and Rhett, Haz’s neighbor and only friend, also added to the fun. Ghost’s quips are a humorous contrast to Kieran’s grouchiness. I’m thrilled he’s paired with the adorable Rhett.

The plot follows Kieran and Haz as they navigate romance, danger, and Haz’s numerous part-time jobs. Mafioso bad guys and irate bosses made Haz’s life more complicated while Kieran did his damnedest to keep his babydoll safe. Chaotic but entertaining, the story kept me hooked despite my frustration with Haz.

The Hazard and The Hitman is a swoony tale of protection and devotion. Overall, not realistic, but cute enough to enjoy, especially if you love a broody hitman falling hard for his disaster of a boyfriend.

Rating:
3 Stars – not exactly setting my world on fire but I liked it

Soundtrack: Hazardous Eyes
Artist: Arca
Album: Hazardous Eyes

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THE HAZARD AND THE HITMAN: Audiobook

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